Lord Jarritos De Tamarindo Starts a Mosh Pit: House of the Beast 4

There are numerous tempting targets available, but LORD JARRITOS sets his sights on the most dire: THE STEVE.



The cannon roars, and a HEAVY PIERCING SHOT flies straight into the lumbering beast!



(With some lucky rolling) the beast's monstrous hide manages to deflect a killing blow, but the impact sends him staggering backwards – to the detriment of several CANNIBALS attempting to stand their ground…



 

And so ends the short and swingy life of CANNON CATCHER.



KIELBASA THE GRAND MAN EATER takes a monstrous foot to the rear end. Continuing his series of death-defying rolls, the leader of the CANNIBALS manages to narrowly avoid death –



But is thrown even further away from his (dwindling) allies, taking his enviable HELM OF ULTIMATE OVERCOMPENSATION with him.



Seeing THE STEVE stagger around the edge of the KEEP with the FROZEN ANCIENT SOLDIER they covet (and wishing to avoid Pantaloonian cannon fire themselves), the CRUSADERS regroup and rush towards the back of the KEEP.



"Fresh lances!  We'll skirt around the back and fall upon the beast on the other side! Keep the tower between us and that cannon!"


Suddenly, the FRIENDLY SKELETON tugs at LORD JARRITOS' sleeve.



"Watch out, new friend! Watch out! BAD CHARLIES!"


The doors of the SECRET LABYRINTH ENTRANCE (the same that LORD JARRITOS and his retinue exited from not long ago) swing open. Out steps…



A SKELETON, but he's not alone! He stands atop the IRON SOLDIER soldier that LORD JARRITOS spotted earlier down in the LABYRINTH! The mechanical monstrosity clanks and shudders as it steps into the sunlight – it clearly packs tremendous power, but appears to be burning some kind of limited fuel source.

 



LORD JARRITOS DE TAMARINDO takes stock of his situation…



What will LORD JARRITOS do?

1. Second time's the charm! Keep shooting THE STEVE!

2. Can't let them get away without a scratch – fire into the CRUSADERS before they disappear around the edge of the KEEP.

3. I don't know what it is, but I don't like it! Open fire on the IRON SOLDIER.

4. I don't know what it is, but I want it!
Try to snipe the SKELETON off the top of the IRON SOLDIER so you can take it for yourself.

5. Rub it in.
Fire GRAPESHOT into the fleeing CANNIBALS.

6. I still want that hat!
Take a last incredibly tricky shot at KIELBASA THE GRAND MAN EATER.

7. LET THEM FIGHT.
Hide behind the PYRAMID and let the chaos run its course.

8. LET'S ROLL!
Everyone's abandoned that wagon – run down the pyramid, grab it, slap your cannon on the back, and make a MOTHER-FLIPPING CANNON CHARIOT.

9. I do what I want!
Make up your own crazy plan:_____________________________
 

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